This Means War
SCREW YOU ARGENTINIAN NAZI-HIDERS
THIS MEANS WAR
You dirtied our blue and white flag and then ashamed our president and leader Halonen. We will never forgive this. We are very proud of our country and it’s rockleg forest industry. So if anyone in the world talks shit about it, we will strike back.
So let’s put some iron to the border and see who is the best:
Finland is THE tangoland. Just listen to Olavi River or Jari Bridgehead. Piazzolla is shit compared to River.
Our president is very famous in the world, even Conan knows our Tarja. Nobody knows who your president is.
Litti is better football player than Maradona.
You have Bolivar and we have Mannerheim. Which one is better? Bolivar? We don’t think so. You are also not very good in war. Remember the Falkland isles? So remember when you make threats: we have won Russians many times in war.
Your government is corrupt and you can’t even pay your debts. Finland, as we all know, is the least corrupted country in the world and we always pay our debts.
If you still have doubts, just one word: Nokia.
So just keep sending your beef and wine to us and shut up. You nazi-hiding, pope-loving pussies !
Just for examples, here are a few videos from our greatest heroes, the rally car drivers. This is how tough real finnish men are. Pain is not going to stop us.
Finland is the greatest
Pattitilanne message to international readers
We put it in your face ! Finland is greatest country in world !
It is proved again! Finland is number one country in the world. This week we organized the best EU summit congress in the world (in the Tampere house, the greatest congress house in the world ever). Now we win the EU komissaar of the year award. Olli Rehn wins it ! He is the greatest EU komissaari
in the world. Can you believe it !
Too bad mr. Erkki Tuomioja, the finnish minister of the out, didn’t win the diplomat of the year awards.
This all happened even it is almost winter here and it is so called kaamos time here.
We also won best EU office of all (the chemicals). We tried to get food office but Italian spaghetti men take it. They shamed our food and called it shit (mämmi, fishcock, Karelia stake and pie). But chemicals is better than food: you make food with chemicals! If you don’t believe this then read all the food packages.
We have proved that we are the best. Here is the list:
- best competition ability in the world
- best eurovision winner ever (Lordi)
- best heavy metal rock band in the world ever (Lordi)
- best hand phones (Nokia, of course)
- best peace negotiator in the world (Martti Ahtisaari)
- Finland has always won Russia many times in the war
- the fastest rally car drivers (Tommi, Mika, Kimi, too many to mention everyone)
- four playboy models from Finland
Maajussit telegram
Thus mediassa
PATTITILANNE UNVEIL MAAJUSSIJUSSIJUSSIN FUTURE KOETTELEMUKSET !
Everybody myötäkärsijöiden exultant Pattitilanne julkaisee yksinoikeudella attainment nation martyr and formally sadly likeness knighthood, well-known mainitsettoman Maajussijussijussin tulevista koettelemuksista. Bracket good!
Maajussijussijussin pang: NEIGHBOUR CRATE RAPIST SISTER !
Maajussijussijussin large-scale mourning: PARENT PLUG BRAIN CEILING !
Maajussijussijussin kohupaljastus: GRANDFATHER TELOITETTIIN HUHTINIEMESSÄ !
Maajussijussijussin loud site: FARM CONFLAGRATION BASIS !
Maajussijussijussi burst: STEM AMPUTOITIIN !
Maajussijussijussin creed: SAIN NEIGHBOUR NARTULTA TOKSOPLASMOOSIN !
Maajussijussijussin adversity: CATTLE OBITUARY LUNATIC BEEF ILLNESS !
Maajussijussijussin ordeal: GRASSHOPPER SÖIVÄT HARVEST !
Maajussijussijussin tumultuous salary: ME MERELY KÄY WICKED LUCK !
Maajussijussijussi sai enough: AQUEOUS HERSELF HIRTEEN !
Näitä olisi more, only annetaan curiosity guess few. Lisätietoja butter attempt angle hence: lukijanaliarviointi@iltalehti.fi
Translation provided by http://www.tranexp.com:2000/Translate/index.shtml
Ban on munansaannokset
PATTITILANNE BAN MUNANSAANNOKSET
Uutissivusto and multimediaportaali Pattitilanne ban everybody munansaannokset sivuiltaan. Pattitilanteen supplier and super is draft test 12.10. since Parole continue anyway october out till.
Kriisikokouksessa Penis Tupissa toimittajakunta indicator co worry kotisivujen inside yksipuolistumisesta. Super Goblet Stool ehdotuksen by every possible munansaannos is hence onward written open. Stool claim, that misunderstanding välttämiseksi collocation chief syllable inverse whenever those seeing display something munansaannoksellista kaksoismerkitystä. Proposition authorized unanimously.
Supplier Two Pervonen anew move, that toimituksen lounaspaikaksi vaihdettaisiin Ritsapillu. Also this proposition authorized. Merely graphic Zany Penis object proposition.
Uudet bye-law not influence Tue Kossua! -campaign Pattitilanne contravene utterly julkisuuteen levinneet report, whose by campaign olisi munansaannoksena suggestive consequence.
Pattitilanne ban also everybody liaison uuden bye-law and Googlen past viikolla busy ostotarjouksen sometimes.
Translation provided by http://www.tranexp.com:2000/Translate/index.shtml
Jorma Porttola Novel
Tamperelaisdekkaristi stabbing christmas market!
Pattitilanne julkaisee alone judicial Jorma Brothel
“Rotting ruumit, rotting psychology”
Pattitilanne julkaisee alone judicial ascending dekkaristin Jorma Brothel icy tightening esikois romance. Chief digit striking now skirt osiosta!
“Mid-Galley uuden deck kirjallisuuden enormous efficacy instance ” – New-fangled Finland 12.10.2006
“Emme hung Brothel esikoiseen. It is oiva addition tasokkaille net sivuille.” – Pattitilanteen shipment
Translation provided by http://www.tranexp.com:2000/Translate/index.shtml
Hockey Special
PATTITILANNE JULKAISEE PARHAAT JORTIKKA LÖÖPIT YEAR DURING
Incipient jääkiekkokauden illustrious Pattitilanne reminiscent coach Hannu Jortikan enormous uranium. Unpublished miscellany lööppejä year during ever Jortikan voitonjuhlista skandaalinkäryiseen helikopterionnettomuuteen till.
Skirt -osiossa mm. ensuing treat:
TPS-hand cucumber along replete Jortikkaa.
Physician huolissaan tulehduksesta : Jortikan mesh swelling umpeen. Also Jortikan suussa sinister inflammation.
Mourning-news Turusta : Jortikan helikopterionnettomuus.
Friend inciting : Pate up Jortikka!
What TPSn : hand eyewitness sauna? Coach Jortikan. Rabid Jortikka lecturing hand outfall foam.
Jortikan lecture panic hand nieleskelemään.
Drunk Jortikka impinge involuntarily inside takaovesta
Hjallis Jortikan velttoilusta : This match no only vetele!
Julkkisnaiset describing : What Jortikassa appeal most
Jortikka frost headache
Translation provided by http://www.tranexp.com:2000/Translate/index.shtml
Cock milking
Thus Reisjärvellä
HUSBAND LYPSI FLOURISH !
Performanssitaiteilija Account Puppy overtaking uusimmalla tempauksellaan. Jiffy käynyt kukonlypsy nähtiin aamuvarhaisella Reisjärven Puskaperän village yeoman Erkki Runny farm courtyard. Voucher befall farm long-standing manager, bygone Sylvi, comment description : “Magnificent cock and rapid remittance! No olisi this farm isäntänahjuksesta comparable.”
“Morning best lypsyaikaa”
Magnificent punaharjaisen flourish supercilious proprietor, artist Puppy no ole possibly lajissaan only. “This is considerably probable yleisempi hobby. Out no merely hence ole thus considerably spoken. Though juncture is past year vary and credence that tällä omalla esiintulollani rohkaisen multiprocessing hesitating this select genre and ripping harrastuksen paris.”
Omaa recent milker arviodessaan Puppy is nevertheless sanoissaan unassuming. “This now oli such rutiinisuoritus. Morning now merely is usually best flourish lypsyaikaa. It is the physiological fact.”
Dandelion flourish ago milk also muuhun at or more upstairs daytime?
“Oman cock milker once diurnal, it serve judging worse crow aisoissa, only science most alan unprofessional, which afoot it considerably useamminkin esimerkiksi certain joensuulainen eläkeläisopettaja convoy milk flourish indeed fourths daytime. Everybody is glorious flourish fyysisestä rehabilitate shut.”
Entä onko kukkorodulla mid?
“This mine now is such stock suomalainen maatiaiskukko, only yea this although asians rodun cream mennen becoming. Genre replacing tulokkaita ovat ago these dark afrokukot, their too until yea contend tosissaan. Niillähän is furthermore this miscellany afore, only no siitä necessarily yourself suorituksessa aught benefit ole “, Puppy statement.
MM – sport tähtäimessä
Omaa cock Puppy purporting preservation unduly lypsämiseltä, because pursuit is hold ns. “ylikunto” ere autumnal kukonlypsyn MM kisoja, which lengthen tällä twice Runkauksen park, Boot county Tervolassa.
Kisoissa measure paremmuudesta eight relegated: milker nopeudessa and lypsetyn ns. “kukonmaidon” amount. Puppy design participate nopeussarjaan tavoitteenaan infringe already past 20 skin long-standing nopeuslypsyn Translator achievement, 3.2 second.
“It is frantic upshot, only study profound health speak, that yea it mahdollisuuksien within is. Providing cock now enduring equally terhakkaassa square like is presently, thus no ole worry daytime. Its cold is naturally thus syyskylmien converging ever worry. If thus pääsee privy, thus tuloskunto putoaa yea tumultuous. Kaikille aloitteleville genre harrastajille haluankin speak, that this is ere very välineurheilua. Technology yea lore that merely, only merely those coping which can shall kukostaan good maintain “, statement Puppy lodging debating long-standing emännän too aiheesta entispäivän and present-day flourish.
Translation provided by http://www.tranexp.com:2000/Translate/index.shtml
Varoitus
Pattitilanteen tyylilajit ovat satiiri ja kaksimielinen huumori.
Pattitilanne ei ole haastatellut ihmisiä, jotka on mainittu tällä sivustolla. Kaikki tekstit ovat mielikuvituksen tuotosta.
Yhteys: pattitilanne(at)gmail.com
